[ He doesn't want to hear this. He doesn't want to hear this from a complete stranger, doesn't want to be here, near Walter. But he hears it, even when he screws his eyes shut tight like it'll wake him at any second
were you alone
and be in bed, none of this, not even the initial journey, ever having happened. All just some horrible dream the night before a big test in school. But it's not, he knows it isn't, Josh is dead (no he's not) and he killed the only family who cared for him (no you didn't) and got the town killed (they're all still alive) because he made a terrible mistake (because of your sacrifice).
He knows this isn't a nightmare, but what the fuck part of it is real?
He wants to answer, wants to tell Walter he's wrong. Wants to stand straight, firm, like he (a good soldier) should. But he can't, he can barely even breathe, and all his body wants to do is curl away from the words that seem to hurt just as much as physical blows.
Because they're true. Because a stranger knows so much about everything that hurt. Because a stranger knows that no matter how much he talked to Elle, every night he went back to a house that was cold aside from his room, aside from Joshua.
Finally, he finds his voice. Even if it's just for one word, even if it shakes. ]
no subject
were you alone
and be in bed, none of this, not even the initial journey, ever having happened. All just some horrible dream the night before a big test in school. But it's not, he knows it isn't, Josh is dead (no he's not) and he killed the only family who cared for him (no you didn't) and got the town killed (they're all still alive) because he made a terrible mistake (because of your sacrifice).
He knows this isn't a nightmare, but what the fuck part of it is real?
He wants to answer, wants to tell Walter he's wrong. Wants to stand straight, firm, like he (a good soldier) should. But he can't, he can barely even breathe, and all his body wants to do is curl away from the words that seem to hurt just as much as physical blows.
Because they're true. Because a stranger knows so much about everything that hurt. Because a stranger knows that no matter how much he talked to Elle, every night he went back to a house that was cold aside from his room, aside from Joshua.
Finally, he finds his voice. Even if it's just for one word, even if it shakes. ]
Stop.